Rescue Picky Eaters From Stressful Mealtime Battles

What does a rice cake have in common with cardboard and pretzels? Can you guess? The answer is: No nutrition: Styrofoam, cardboard, pretzels, and Goldfish - they have no nutritional value. As a matter of fact, we could add glue and Play Dough to that list, because basically, they all use flour and water. We could make a list of all the other non-food items that we could make with flour and water.

The question was asked recently, “What do I get my picky eater to eat? They don't want to eat anything that's nutritious that I put on the table. And now I just give them any kind of junk food because I just want them to eat.”

But Mama, the thing is, when you allow a little child whose stomach is the size of their fist to fill up on junk, that’s a problem.

So, if you take a look at your fist, that's the size of your stomach. A little kiddo who makes a fist, that's the size of their stomach. It's about as big as a small apple. And when we allow our kiddos to just get something in their belly so that they eat something, that's actually sabotaging the very goals we have for their nutrition, whether it looks like a rice cake or pretzels, or chips or or goldfish or whatever the junk food is.

If that junk food fills up that little tiny belly that’s only as big as their fist, Is there any likelihood that nutrition is going to get into that belly next? Well, no. The belly has no room and so there is no messaging to the brain to eat more.

So, although it feels so intuitive to say, "Please just eat something,... anything!” the best scenario is to let that little belly grumble. And when we can put food out, even if they don't like it, something nutritious, something that's just out on the table, available, we take the pressure off of our children. We take away all that negative energy around eating.

So what typically happens is our kiddos don't want to eat the healthy food, they spit it out. They gag, they throw it, they're complaining. Fine. What we tend to do is to force them to eat it, or we complain or we shame them. That creates a lot of negative vibes around food... Well, who would want to eat. with all that negative association?

What if we just put healthy food out there, just there for nibbling. If it's just out there and in arm’s reach, if they're distracted and maybe reached for something, because their stomach is growling at them, that’s a recipe for success.

Just make the food available, something like a crudite - depending on the age of the child - in fun shapes. Be careful with the size and shape because we don't want to deal with choking hazards, but anything that you can put out that is a fruit, vegetable protein, even a cheese (if they can handle the dairy). It's colorful.

You can make fun shapes and put out different dips for them and even different eating utensils for them to eat their food with. Things like a straw or spoon or FORK or CHOPSTICKS make eating fun. Again, determine options based on the age of the child as to what they can manage on their own without any pressure.

The idea is that food is colorful and fun and no pressure.

If healthy food is available and you put it in places where they're going to be, like near the TV, playroom, kitchen table, or reading room. At that point we don’t have to make a big deal at mealtime, because you only create anxiety and stress and disappointment and all those negative feelings.

Mealtime is supposed to be a time for the family to come together for food, fellowship, and fun. But don't give your kiddo Styrofoam. It's going to fill up the belly, and then they're not going to be hungry.

Now, last point I want to make is this: Let’s say your kiddo puts the healthy food in their mouth and spits it out. That's okay. It hit the tastebuds. That’s fine for starts. Over the course of time, when the experience is repeated over and over and over, the ability to tolerate a food - the texture, taste, and smell - begins to grow just like a muscle. It takes time. Don't give up right away.

Young kids who are fussy and finicky are experimenting with their will and their power in the home, exploring all those things. No strong-willed child is going to be, say, “Okay, I don't like this flavor, but I'm going to eat it anyway.” That's not really going to happen.

So be strategic, Try some of the tools, stay with it over and over. And if you still have trouble getting your kiddo to eat, reach out to me. Let's work together. I've helped hundreds of moms resolve problems just like yours. This is nothing new. Everybody goes through it and sometimes just navigating through that little hurdle means that you're going to conquer the next hurdle that much better.

I'm looking forward to chatting you. I can't wait to help you rescue your fussy eater from mealtime battles together.